Affected by Sexual Addiction

-Ask the Expert-

Question:

I have a huge problem! I am affected by sexual addiction. To make you better understand the gravity of my situation, I will say this: in 3 months I had sex with about 30 different guys.

Now I found a person that I like and I want to stay with, and that apparently succeeded in stopping my impulses! But I am scared that it will come back.

Answer:

Dear Gio, you talk about sexual addiction, but I do not know if this diagnosis comes from a professional, or if it is your perception based on your behavior.

However, I guess that right now the situation is very difficult for you. Like it happens in drug addiction, what you are addicted to is a mean to alleviate pain, stress, and anxiety. In the specific case of sexual addiction, for example, it could be your way to fill an intense need for affection and gentleness. It could be a request for attentions, or even a confirmation of your physical aspect (to reinforce your self-esteem).

Whatever is the motivation that leads you to have so many sexual intercourses, It seems that it makes you live sexuality in an obsessive way, to the point that it creates a vicious circle that becomes difficult to escape.

But now you found a person that you like, and it looks like he stopped your impulse. From your words, I imagine that you would like this relationship to last, and to be “healed” from your “sickness”. But you are scared that the impulse could come back.

I can understand what you are experiencing, so my suggestion is to contact a professional, possibly an expert in this type of addiction, so that he can do a more sharp diagnosis, and he can find the right way to make you live healthily your sexuality.

This means that you have to take the responsibility of accepting who you are, and of choosing the path that will let you have the best quality of life possible. You will have to work on yourself, and on what you want from yourself, from your sexuality, and from your relationships.

I wish you good luck.

Answer:

Giulia Checcucci, psychotherapist

Question:

Gio, 21 years old

Publication Date: 09/20/2010

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