Sexuality: a weird behavior

-Ask the Expert-

Question:

Hi, since a couple of months I have been experiencing a very embarrassing behavior. I cannot look in the eyes the people I talk to. All the time I find myself looking at the pubic area of guys and the breasts of girls. This embarrasses me, and my interlocutor, that usually reacts by giving me weird looks and covering themselves.

Also, it is about two years that I am not in a relationship, and all the times that I happen to meet a guy that I like, I run away, I avoid talking to him or meeting him again.

With all the guys that I am not interested in, I am calm and extroverted.

I will be waiting for your answer, thank you!

Answer:

Dear Ann, the behaviors that you described highlight a dysfunction in your ability to have interpersonal relations. In fact, they seem to point to an ambivalence in your way of living sexuality, and this brings you to a great curiosity and attraction for sexual body-parts, and at the same time it force you to run away from the possibility of having any kind of relationship.

Sexuality is a very important face of life, because besides having a biological goal, it builds a source of physical and psychological well-being. It is important no to underestimate this. Often, fear of sexuality is linked to a fear of intimacy and closeness, also psychological, with the others, that risk to be perceived as aggressors and so as potential enemies.

It is fundamental to understand where this fear comes from, in order to overcome it and be able to get close to the others with spontaneity, and at the same time to feel serene while living sexuality and relationship.

Have good day, and contact me if you have any other question.

Answer:

Manuela Biagi, Psychologist

Question:

Ann, 29 years old

Publication Date: 10/17/2007

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